The Art of Solo Travel - Grand Adventures and Artist Dates…..

I am always happy with some alone time, so it’s no surprise I might just take myself on a trip or two to Italy just to soak in beauty. The first time I made the decision it came not just a yearning but a need to fill myself up again.  After many years in the full time parenting gig, my eldest child was fourteen at the time and my youngest was six, I was more than ready.  Armchair travel had lit a match in my shoe and what’s more it was either that or seek a therapist.  I needed a circuit breaker basically.  And Italy was calling.

My spontaneity was dormant for a number of years so it was just a sense that the relentless of motherhood might take me down if I didn’t put myself on the to-do list.  I was happy enough, grateful too. I wrote plenty of gratitude lists in those days, so it wasn’t for a lack of sincerity, the thing is it went deeper than that.   At the time it honestly didn’t matter to me if I had a companion or not I just needed to have a fresh experience.  And most of my friends were on the treadmill anyway, houses, kids, partners, no one could really hang up their boots and go anyway.   

It is all fine and good if you love to have a companion, and if you need a companion. And don’t get me wrong I adore a companion, but every now and then, it is good to take the road less traveled via the solo route.  I say that because there is so much to gain from the experience. I guess I have to start off with the obvious thing and mention I have only traveled alone in Australia and in Italy so I am limited to those two countries, yet I have visited France, Canada, America, Asia. For this blog, I shall concentrate my energies on sharing about Italy and my solo travel experience there since that is my jam…  This is all about my journey and what I have learnt along the way.  Experiences, resources, and observations on solo travel……… I am also going to be relating my experience back to being in Venice on the whole, because for some reason this was the place I felt intimidated by traveling alone to, if I am really honest. A few months back I spent nearly a week there and it was a big deal for me and a great example of solo travel at heart, so here we go….

When you travel alone, it’s not that you are really alone, the city or the place is your companion, it wants to be discovered.  You are the detective in your own mystery novel. You get to choose. You can plan it to the ninth degree or you can throw the cards on the table and let serendipity lead the way.  And if you choose to do the thing, regardless of having a companion for the journey well, the gift of discovery is all yours.

But why would we travel alone?  To get out of our comfort zone, to explore something that delights us, to slip beneath the radar of the everyday. Because in another place, a new city, or a new country nothing is the same, even the nuance of buying a coffee becomes an adventure.  And one thing that I love, you can kind of reinvent yourself in another place.  You take the fresh and lighter you because you leave all the other things behind to explore, and in a way I think it is play. 

Sure you feel a little intimidated, sure you worry that no one will understand you, but it is easy if you are prepared.  You can write some notes in case of an emergency for language exchange and you can have your translation app ready. Numerous times I have managed this way. And if you are really willing learn some of the language, just the basics, you will find your confidence expand. And seriously in places like Italy people are friendly. They want to help you, they want to talk and ask where you are from, but be careful not to ask questions, like quanta costa, because you will never understand the answer unless you take more than one lesson in Italian!  This is a moment we had when Italy the first time, when Italy was still using the lira and not the euro!  We had no idea of the reply. But these days honestly we have so many resources at our finger tips to make solo travel easy, especially I think with some kind of smart phone you have a great resource to stop you from stumbling in the wrong direction.

There are two things here when you plan to travel, the before and the after of the event. The ensuing travel experience and the joy of the moment, because as we know anticipation is a good enough high sometimes.  But don’t let over analysing before a trip take precident. The truth is when you get to the place and you arrive, something else happens, all of your senses are heightened and the moment is more than happy to reveal itself…. Although at the very same time, it pays to book some things if you would like to see for example the Last Supper in Milan or the walk up Florence’s beautiful Duomo to stare at the tip of Brunellechi’s dome.  There is no doubt that there are only so many tickets in a day, and if you are invested in a certain experience then you have to book ahead….And this is a great way to discover parts of the city you are visiting when you put a pin down on a place and circle out from there.

On the way to visit Santa Maria del Fiore to climb the Camponile, Giotto's bell tower.  You never feel lonely in a place like Florence, always there is something sumptuous around the next corner... And if you climb the bell tower or to the tip of the great dome, you will be in a great line of people huffing and puffing, after the 300th and then the 400th stair.  Is great fun!

In Venice, where every day is a party and guess what, you are invited….

I once asked Susan Van Allen, the travel writer on the podcast if you were female traveling solo in Italy where she would go and her answer not only surprised me but delighted me.  She said “Venice”.  I was always worried about all the alley ways and the bridges everywhere that would be lead one astray, and I wondered if I would lose my head getting lost so often.  But one of the reasons Susan suggested Venice was simply because you don’t feel lonely in Venice, there are too many people and crowds, especially around the tourist spots.  I liked her suggestion and I thought about it a lot.  I was dreaming of visiting the Peggy Guggenheim museum so certainly Venice was on my mind.  But the real take away I got from Susan and I do know this from experience but I hadn’t quite articulated it into words…. When you go too to the smaller villages in the middle of nowhere you do often feel kind of obvious, and language barriers can be more of an issue too.  If you want to be alone but not lonely then busy cities like Rome, Florence, Venice, Turin and Milan are fantastic places to visit where there is lots to do and ample public transport, great piazzas and walking adventures to be had.  All of these cities I can vouch for as a solo traveler.

Wandering down to the Navigli zone in Milan on a Saturday morning was a highlight, what a great area to explore with loads of great cafes, restaurants and markets with books and clothes. A Perfect Solo Travel Place!

Okay some Real on the case for Pros and Cons….

Pro:  You get to do the thing you really want to do, like visit a particular place, town or city or a particular museum, because you want to!  This may seem totally obvious, but honestly how often do we do the thing we actually want to do in a day?  With so many distractions and expectations in life, are you the type to spend the day in the museum and just marvel at something?  Or you can buy a two day pass and just go from vaperetto to vaperetto and watch the mysteries of La Serenissima from the Grand Canal….  Options in other words, you get to own them and reward yourself with a day of full blown pleasure. It honestly depends how much you can handle! But I will at the end of this blog give you an activity to remedy this if you haven’t ever had that kind of experience.  It is good to expand your nervous system and I have a great activity for you to experiment with if you are not used to a day of fun under the title - Artist’s Dates…

Con:  Choice, the fact that it is your choice can be overwhelming for some people, and for some people even disabling.  For me I just accept that in my personal world I can only do a few of the things, a few great things because I only have a certain amount of days and resources like money, so I go to the top of the list. Here is a fine example….Recently I went to the Peggy Guggenheim museum in Venice, yet did not end up visiting the Doges Palace.  I felt a little guilty about this and slightly annoyed, however life got in the way.  I almost did but it was 3pm my legs were vere sore. I had already walked to the Castello district that morning, so I sat in the Gran Caffe Chioggia across the piazza, enjoyed a hot chocolate and watched the rain and the wind gently toss the people about in their ponchos, and the black gondoliers bumping up and down on the canal. It was very nice.  I wrote in my diary.  I was happy and it is all good in other words. And it was a damn fine hot chocolate and much less precious than visiting the Florian… so all was well.

So choice can be anxiety inducing or absolutely an open hearted just do it moment. Mostly, I think it is about having some conviction in your intentions and what exactly you would want to achieve or fulfil while on your travel adventure.

My approach to travel is…. Make one thing your target and let it ripple out from there.  I personally love to let the day surprise me.  For instance after seeing the Peggy Guggenheim exhibit I got to talking to the woman from Berlin, who was 80 years old, dressed in hot pink and traveling alone.  I was feeling more than happy to discover this detail.  I felt that sweet joy that can only happen when synchronicity lands.  The reason we ended up chatting is because I asked her to take a photo of me since I pretty much had none and selfies and I are not friends, so I asked a random visitor who seemed happy to oblige.

We got talking, and then I took a photo of her and everything became funny.  As I was taking photos of her she was commanding how I use the camera and which part of her she would like photographed, only the top third in fact, because that was her best part as she looked wistfully off into the distance with her cheek turned, since that was her good side.  I was laughing a lot, and then she went through the photos I took on her camera and deleted nine out of ten, and asked me to take some more.  I was shocked and wondering what exactly I had got myself into by this stage.  But I obeyed. Anyway after the portrait session on Peggy’s terrace we got talking and she told me she was 80 years old and traveling alone…Which I was gloriously pleased to learn.

Here is my Berlin friend deleting all those photos….he he, a delight for the travel girl!

I obviously marvelled at the fact that she was 80 and still having adventures.  She said she didn’t eat out though.  No dinners out, she always took her food with her wrapped in plastic for in a bag.  Now this was true, because she was unwrapping some fruit cake or something from cling film when I spoke to her.  I felt a little disappointed for her not enjoying even one meal a day, because I think that is a special part of traveling, to take a meal where you can eat the local cuisine and rest and repair for the next adventure, but no.  Who knows maybe when I am 80 and wandering around Italy I will be the same.  So my Berlin friend told me, she took her food with her and didn’t go out at night.  She was very happy with her I-pad back at the hotel.  80 year olds and their I-pads.  I know a lot about this generation, there are a few in my life!  However she was in Venice sightseeing and that was significant, obviously coming from Germany to Italy is not so much of a task as it is for the Australian contingent.  I say this because my Nan, who we call Great Nan, is in her mid 80s and would love nothing more than to experience more travels.  She got turned off after catching something nasty on a ship over to New Zealand and then after that worried it might happen again and canceled her plans to go back to Europe.  And now she longingly despairs over having the money and the time, but not the physical strength to do it.  And she traveled solo in her seventies so I know it can be done.

So you see, in life if you a few things line up then I say do it.  Because while you are relatively young and fit, you can handle the dramas that come with the territory of travel.  We just get caught up in the nitty gritty of daily living…Anyway, I digress, I guess ultimately I am very suspicious of waiting for all the dots to line up in life, because often leaving it till later, there is often something else in the way.

Peggy Guggenheim Museum, Dorsoduro, Venice Italy 

Since I have mentioned the Peggy Guggenheim, you should know it is in the Dorsoduro district of Venice just near the Accademia Bridge.  The museum was once Peggy’s house.   If you don’t know Peggy Guggenheim, she hailed from the wealthy New York Guggenheim family. Her father sadly went down on the Titanic when she was in her early teens, and after a few failed relationships and a marriage lived the last 30 years of her life in Venice on the Grand canal.  She died on my birthday in fact, but a few years before I was born.  At the time she was looking for a project and started a few art galleries and basically bank rolled writers and one artist in particular Jackson Pollack before his art went crazy in New York.  But the thing is Peggy kept buying art, even as the Second World War erupted she bought work and eventually this work would find its way to Venice.  It is a small gallery with lovely grounds and you can stop there for a snack too and is just a hop, skip and a jump from the popular Accademia Bridge.

Eating alone, how to minimise discomfort….a few thoughts…

Mostly I think people worry about eating alone more than the rest of the business of traveling solo, and are turned off by the anxiety it induces.  I say this because I have been asked about it a few times.  Often I think this is the dinner meal more than the lunch meal…but this depends on just how much you dine out in general.  If you are a novice, it does take practise to feel comfortable taking a table alone at a restaurant…

However one thing, I often find myself doing while traveling is making the lunch the bigger meal. Often in Italy I would have two courses, a primo and a main or a main and a starter, honestly it depended…. I would enjoy some wine, and really take my time…. So that is one way to enjoy fine dining without getting all worked up, but if you prefer your main meal of the day at night and option is to book ahead and that way at least, it is like they are expecting you, and always think about a book for companion or your phone with a book to read.  I don’t really like to be tied down in my day so I rarely would do this unless I was meeting up with some one. 

Otherwise this can be a great time to catch up on instagram if that is your thing or just write like I do.  This is a great time to take your journal and write a few details about your day, write about the meal you just ordered and the places you have seen.  When in another country there is so much that is not the everyday, so take notes on the new things you can see!  My diary is personally my favourite travel companion, and later down the track it is such a joy to read descriptions and details that I sincerely forget I had scrawled down.  A travel diary is a gold mine, never underestimate its value.

At night I would get something easy or sometimes didn’t even need a meal, so this worked a treat, and sometimes this lunch thing might happen later in the day, so I might stop for a snack earlier and then have a late lunch, but honestly you do you.  I love a leisurely meal, and if I have been traveling on foot all day around a place, or a city, I am usually cactus at night.  You can also order in at a hotel, or use the hotel restaurant as your place, but book ahead so you feel confident.  I have a great piece coming at the end of this share on how I have managed this over the years.

I love trying the local wines, and the local cuisine in a new place, that is the priority over any concerns over dining alone, and plus funny enough some one always ends up chatting to you which always makes me laugh. If it is not the nieghbouring diner it is the waiter...

I have also realised through writing this podcast that in truth, my enthusiasm to be in a place, or to try a certain food, or to have a particular experience usually out weighs my anxiety,  and tips in the right direction.  I do feel the anxiety sometimes, certainly travel opens the door to the unknown and anxiety is completely triggered by this, but the more you just do it anyway the easier it becomes. I would also like to say I have a great book for people who have high anxiety levels, it is called “Travel for Stoics: Empowering the Solo Traveler who is Obsessive, Introverted and Compulsive” by Eva Rome…. Sometimes you just need good resources to get you through.  I also found if my head was getting too busy contemplating the next thing I just put some music on and my AirPods and just let it go, music can be rather soothing too.

And one of my tricks while in Italy recently was to go to lunch between 12-12.30.  In Italy for instance, this is early for Pranzo lunch, but the good thing is they are open, someone will be ordering and there was always plenty of tables, so that does work a treat.    Because there is nothing worse when you go to a restaurant and it is full, or they squeeze you in a tight corner and everyone is watching you, this is why if you just get there a little earlier then this situation can be eliminated entirely.

And one thing, in countries like Italy and France food is a big part of the culture, they want you to enjoy yourself, with a companion or not.  So don’t worry too much, enjoy the possibilities like this beautiful meal at La Trattoria del Tribunale in Parma.

This is how I managed when I had a restaurant I really wanted to go to in Padova and Emilia Romagna.  And a side note, if feeling brave ask the locals where they go, often this will be off the beaten path, and you get an authentic experience too…. Just be warned though there may not be a menu in English in that case, but you can wing it like I did, which helps to know a few words in Italian in the realm of food translations, but still it was a great experiment to see what will turn up at the table.

A coffee with Diego in Padova, Veneto... Just another spontaneous conversation with a local

And another “pro” on the restaurant deal….Two times I got to the restaurant a bit early. I was just eager and I ended up having some great conversations with locals over the table, espresso was ordered and we chatted about life, Italy and Australia.  Usually people pick up on your accent and then a fine conversation results.  This was at lunch, is a lot more casual even in fine dining restaurants, and some of my favourite spontaneous conversations happened.  So indeed this is the good thing about solo travel is, if you are alone, then you tend to end up meeting interesting people that are generally local, and you can ask them places, or special interest points of the place you are in.  Fortunately I guess, they did speak English, so for me and my world this helped a lot.  And in Italy for instance it is very respectable to dine like this at lunch, its not a special event.   I noticed a few times retired couples, business men, friends and then solo diners too.  It was great and it made me very happy.

There is no doubt I ended up chatting a lot at each restaurant, especially if people see me writing for some reason, this opens up a conversation.  And honestly I never felt alone in places like Padua, Parma, Venice, Bologna and the cities I mentioned earlier.  I think if you sit there and scroll too much on Instagram you might as well not bother traveling at all, just a little but not too much. If you are hooked into your phone people don’t bother to talk to you, its mundane and a bit boring…. Also writing this up has got me thinking about restaurants….Often the nicer the restaurant the better the service and hospitality factor, even a solo diner will be treated with upmost cordiality.  Here is an example, I believe it was my first day in Milano on the recent trip…..

I had my morning to see the Last Supper and visited the Santa Maria Cathedral and wandered back after a coffee at the cafe across the street.  I booked that morning a walk up the terrace of the Duomo so I had about three hours and left on my way to the main cathedral square.  I was just following my nose and saw this great hip pasta restaurant with gorgeous seating out on the side walk and was quite busy inside.  I thought I will go inside and ask for a table, the young waitress ignored me for ages and finally after checking my green pass, took me through the middle of the cafe and then sat me next to the door entrance with my back to the exit and my face looking at a glass partition and a pasta machine.  I was on a stool at a counter.  She didn’t even give me a menu.  Then I looked down at the code thing in front realising I probably had to order over an app.  I sat there for a minute, looking at the two girls beside me, the pasta machine and the brick wall and then I swiftly got up and walked out the door past the patrons at the cute little French garden tables, and the plates of pasta. 

I left and continued walking until I found myself across the road in the most perfect location, a Ristorante in a piazza with the church of San Lorenzo to my back.  I sat out in the sun, was given a menu and had some friendly banter with the older Italian gentleman. I ordered some mineral water, a smooth Vino Rosso and a plate of the finest of Milanese cuisine. And there I  waited for my food basking in the light in a quite corner in the city of Milano.  The lunch was superb and the hospitality and alfresco scene a delight. 

At the Cantina della Vetra - Enoteca Con Cucina in Milano, lovely service and wonderful food....

So, the sweet message, if ever slighted like this because you are a tourist or not young and hip, or perhaps dining solo, you don’t have to stay. It is a privilege and a service that you will pay for with your own money, so just grab your bag and walk straight back out.  It was my first lunch on the trip and a sweet little lesson.  I continued on with a bounce in my step and all was well I wandered on to the Duomo, that Gothic beauty I was most looking forward to seeing for the first time.

Another “con”….. Okay the only time I strangely feel a bit alone, is at a coastal resort town, on the trip, for some reason this may trigger me, not always, but a little, there is something about the ambience on the seaside, and maybe because I then slow down a little.  I find anytime in a city or a cosmopolitan place like Siena, Cortona, Padua or Verona I don’t think twice, but by the sea I seem to shift gears and get to ruminating more. It is funny it happened again while in Camogli in Liguria recently. I was very happy, very at ease, well I was after I found my accomodation (more on that side soon).

I walked along the promanade and then I kind of felt that pang, mostly I was wishing my kids were with me, like I knew they would love it, and next a guilt trip, but certainly something just rested on my shoulder there.  I had this thought at the time, a strong feeling, the thought was, “Don’t over think it” and I feel that is the key message… When you are alone it can trigger all sorts of worries, or feelings and maybe that is why people just don’t want to go there. They don’t like having to face themselves or dig a little deeper about what the problem is, but if you just have to take a deep breathe and chill, don’t get too paranoid, or let any anxieties get in the way. 

Camogli, Liguria... a beautiful place to spend a few days exploring

If you are prone to being hard on yourself you have to talk yourself around, give yourself some credit for doing the thing, for being brave, for trusting the universe, for making your way there, whatever.  But the thought when I had it, don’t over think it was like a missile, it jolted me.  So I didn’t, I ordered an Americano, and I stared at the sea. I thought to myself, you are 47 years old, you never had the chance to do this kind of thing in your twenties, but you can do it now, and salute Italia.

Ideas and Thoughts on where to Stay Accomodation Wise:

Okay I have some advice regarding accomodation, it is just something to be mindful of if traveling alone…and something I have learnt a few times the hard way, funny enough by the sea again.  Be careful where you book your accomodation.  If for instance you do the AirBnb thing, you can get a little frustrated and pained when even though it says 10 minutes from the station it is like half way up the mountain, up seven flights of stairs and even the taxi driver is confused.  Sometimes it pays to simply pay a little more in the cash department and have the convenience of something better (You can definitely get excellent properties from AirBnb but do your homework on location!). You will not regret this later, in fact you will barely even think twice.  For instance I had one night in Genova recently so I just parked myself at the Savoy, simple, a five minute walk from the railway line. I got to my room early, by 12.30 in fact, they had plenty of rooms and go the key, and the rest of the day was mine. 

All I would say is ask questions and be careful if alone that your place is not too far away from conveniences and public transport etc. This happened the next time in Camogli, it was too difficult to find when you just have yourself to rely on.  I had to get in a taxi, and even then the place where I stayed kind of had there numbers wrong, so it was painful.  When I was in Rome by myself I stayed next to the Piazza Navona in a cute little hotel a few streets away and that was the best decision I made, it was a little touristy but then again, that’s exactly what I needed at the time.  It was easy, central and I could find something easy in the main piazzas, or I could walk a little further and have quite an authentic experience and I just felt very happy just being there.  So a good decision.

Genova, from the Piazza Principe Station over to the pretty pink Savoy Hote

All of us have our ways. I was sitting by myself on the train from Siena to Florence, and had a couple ask me if we were on the right train, all of us feel a bit intimidated or anxious at times. It isn’t easy and you are living way out of the comfort zone, but that’s what traveling is, it wakes you up, snaps you out of your patterns and well earned grooves, it loosens the grip on the everyday, it gives you a new out look, it educates you.  And I think sometimes when you are by yourself you really get to learn so much about yourself.
You rely on your own instincts and intuitions which is at the end of the day a gift and dare I say, very empowering.   It is about trust, and being optimistic and open to the spirit of travel taking your hand leading the way…And I like what Jospeh Campbell the writer of The Hero’s Journey once said, “Any disaster you can survive is an improvement in your character, your stature, and your life.  What a privilege”….

I loved wandering around Milano, there were loads of locals socialising outdoors and wandering about at night, it was great to be there too...

When traveling alone their are highs and lows, for me the highs always out way the lows!  Every time no doubt….But the truth is if you like travel and adventure then you have to deal with a little anxiety, there is always the forces of the unknown and eventually what will be will be, but you can put your best step forward and accept that some things will work very smoothly and some will not, and you the rest you will figure it out.  Generally most things work out in my experience….

Another “Con”, getting lost, well this circles back to visiting Venice. I will be honest I was little nervous to really do the city by myself at first.  I was worried about thin alley ways skirting in and out of back streets, and not finding my way back again.   In Venice, the truth is I used my data on my iPhone regularly for maps, because a physical map of Venice was not going to cut it.  One, I needed a magnifying glass to see it and two, it is generally a busy place, with passages and small streets leading off into a hundred directions, but the good news is when Napoleon was there for that short stint he wanted the Fondamenta to be like the sidewalks of Paris. These days it is wonderful with wide open main streets. You can zip over bridges and canals and there are many signs, this way to the vapporetto, this way to the Rialto. Yet every single day I never could tell if I had to go right or left. All of it was wonderfully overwhelming…..The cafes, the pigeons, the men in boats delivering their goods.….  I managed in other words.

The beauty of Venice, a great place to explore and enjoy the many layers of Italy

This next part is for people who are vulnerable at night, women, the elderly, and anyone who prefers to not carry a gun in their purse.  My number one rule is if alone, no late flights into cities, nor trains, nor buses if alone and you do not want to have to navigate at night when you are tired and or not sure of what is happening on the other side.  But I do have a funny story to tell (shared on the podcast) which will stay with me for ever, so now I am also eliminating early flights in the morning back to Australia too. Is just too darn early, and walking alone in the city of Milan at 4am is not exactly convenient, was mostly safe, but maybe I was just lucky!

Milan Centrale is very safe in the day, and not too bad at night, or at 4.30 in the morning!

Is traveling alone and making that time for your own self, a selfish act?  Or is it something bigger? 

I am blessed with a family of five, we are in truth quite a close family. We hang out, we go to the movies, we watch the Office together, re-runs and all. We go to restaurants and watch the marvel films, we make the time, we don’t go on too many big holidays, but are fortunate to go and spend time near the sea regularly. I guess the honest truth is, I like to step away and refuel myself. Often I cook the thing that every one else prefers, often I have too many chores that kill creativity and flow time, so going off once a blue moon kind of smooths out all my complexities, or certainly side lines them for a while …. Part of me has felt guilty, sure, but it is still worth it. Any mental anguish I can handle, because what I get from this self reliance, and the problem solving part of me is very good. It is easy and somewhat lazy too, to become hooked into your partners expectations.  We can be fulfilled by going it alone, we can be lifted and refueled too.

In truth it is a great service to be the people you live with, a happy parent and or a happy partner is indeed a community service.  And yes, you will catch some judgment off others, likely close family members who won’t understand. But, don’t worry about that because it is your life, not theirs, and do they inspire you anyway, are they your shining beacon of how you want to live this one precious life?  For me, no, not exactly.  In the book, “Alone Time: Four Cities, Four Seasons, and the Pleasures of Solitude”, Rosenbloom the author sites that,  “the married with kids solo traveler market is growing as well.  Nearly 10% of American Travellers with partners and children are taking solo vacations during the year” . 

And it is not that you want to be a recluse or not see anyone, ironically I am more a recluse when I am at home.  I don’t want to leave, but once I am out in the world that is another matter entirely, I love it.  I get hooked in, one thing after the next. I want to do it all,  it is a great paradox really.  If you are like me and have people in your life who may or may not get it, you are going to have to have some difficult conversations.  That’s the thing, you have to trust yourself.  I have had to push myself and have the hard conversation. And you will rock the boat, a few times.

The thing I think you get from travel, whether alone or not, is an education, in people, places, art, architecture, history.  For me, it is about curiosity and understanding more about a place. There is so much to understand about the food, the region and the people.  I love to feel into that, the education is worth all of the hard parts that come with it, and the expense.  And when you are there by yourself, your senses are very alert to the discovery, the sense of awe that can tap you on the shoulder and bring a quick tear to your eye. 

I want to say if you are interested in a spiritual experience, you are far more likely to have one when traveling alone.  I think mostly because you are more open to a sense of spontaneity and ideas.  Ideas and thoughts can be your friend if you are alone. If the world is caving in on you in your normal life, it is always in flow time, or quite time alone that things shift.  So if spirituality is your interest, go take yourself somewhere that is significant to you. I have had high sublime moments looking at art in Assisi and standing in a square in Ancient Rome. Yet, mostly it feels empowering to take your own life seriously, your own interests, and putting yourself on the to do list in life.

Rosenbloom says something else I love in her book, “Alone time is an invitation, a chance to do the things you’ve longed to do”.  Exactly, and why not give in to that.

The Cannaregio in Venice, the most fascinating sestieri of the Venetian Lagoon, also known as the Jewish Ghetto.. I recommend wandering this neighbourhood for an authentic Venetian experience, and some wonderful travel photography if that is your thing, the restaurants are excellent and the atmosphere sublime!

Now lastly I wanted to share something about artist dates, have you heard of them?  Well over time, perhaps the past twenty or thirty years dare I say I have loved the work of Julia Cameron and the book ‘The Artists Way’.  This book is a twelve week course on recovering your creativity and your life. If you are stuck or depressed, or just lacking that ignition key, this book can help light your way.  Since the first time I did the course in about 1994 I have used the creative practises many times over the years. One practise, ‘the morning pages’, writing freehand, freestyle about what’s good bad or whatever you are thinking about, basically putting the drama on the page every morning, and artists dates.  I believe in a way the practise of artist dates has kind of made me into the person I am on some level. I realise in a way for me travel is like the ultimate artist date, that just happens to last longer than one day.

The artist date is about taking yourself alone to a place because you are curious about a thing. It could be a museum, a pet shop, a stationary store, honestly it doesn’t matter what the thing is. It could be a restaurant, yet it doesn’t have to cost money, it can, it doesn’t exactly matter. 

Over the years for me my artists dates have been galleries, art stores, and trips to places in my childhood, walks at sunset with some favourite music, and a wander past some houses on a certain street for instance.  It is about doing something fun, that awakens that child spirit inside of you, just for the sake of it because you are interested, curious or simply delighted by something. 

I recently spoke to a very old friend who indeed mentioned she had been thinking of me because she was doing The Artists Way. Now this woman is an academic and busy with a small family.  I asked if she was doing the artists dates, and she said just the morning pages and the weekly writing activities in the book.  She said she felt stuck.  Now I really think the artist date is key, because its honestly about the detour…Where you see something new, you do something different and just feel something awaken inside of you. 

I think when you are blocked for instance and you can’t kind of move forward, I believe it has a lot to do with a lack of fun, and life being too serious and perhaps too repetitive.  Hence the artist’s date that unlocks the door to your creative, fun self.

Travel and taking photo of beautiful places is like the ultimate artist’s date…..I highly recommend the book "The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron

So the reason I bring this up… If you are unsure about traveling alone, take yourself on an artists date, in your own city, your own suburb, or catch the train somewhere two hours away and explore the place.  Stop and have a long lunch, take your journal, or a book to read while sitting at a table in the sun…get out of your comfort zone, go somewhere new.

I think because I have always done this kind of thing even before I had children and after. I have always enjoyed my own company.  Even when my children were quite little I would make a day and just go out and do my own thing. I would see a film, go to the nursery and buy a rose. Once I even watched two films in one day!  I just let go, it was fun and restorative. And I sense that all of these moments have made it quite easy for me to take myself back to Italy because I wanted to explore and learn more about the culture. 

And I remember listening to a podcast with Elizabeth Gilbert on The Tim Ferris Show (Episode #430) some time ago, when he asked her about the book The Artist’s Way. She said it was the book and the practises within it that led her to learning the Italian language in the first place just because it made her happy, and then ultimately making the decision to go to Italy, and then obviously writing the book Eat Pray Love.

I guesss what I am saying is that without The Artist’s Way there likely would not be an Eat, Pray, Love….So there you are.  Artist dates and morning pages can change your life.  I know they have changed mine. 

Copyright Michelle Johnston - All Podcast Material and Artwork

Shownotes:

Alone Time: Four Cities, Four Seasons, and the Pleasures of Solitude by Stephanie Rosenbloom

Susan Van Allen Podcast: #40 - 100 Places in Italy Every Woman Should Go with Susan Van Allen (A Writer in Italy Podcast)

The Artists Way by Julia Cameron - Morning Pages and Artist’s Dates!!

Podcast to Listen to: Wild Podcast with Sarah Wilson, Season 5, Episode 3: How to live the artist’s way…..Recommended if needing some inspiration on finding your muse

Travel for Stoics: Empowering the Solo Traveler who is Obsessive, Introverted and Compulsive by Eva Rome (a great resource if this is one of your issues or struggles)

Tim Ferris Show #430 Elizabeth Gilbert’s Amazing Creative Toolkit: Saying No, Trusting Intuition, Seeking Awe, Bathing in Grief, and Index Cards

Who knows, perhaps my new friend from Berlin was a portrait photographer, she snapped a great shot of me in the end……Thank you Venice…..So yes, here I am on Peggy’s Terrace!!